Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A bartender walks into a bar. He serves alcohol for a living.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A man and a women are having sex. He farted so she left before he came.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did Martha Stewart's skin hurt? My friend has a skin condition :( and is dying, skin cancer is not something to make fun of.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Q. What do you call a white guy with a black dick? A. Gay

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

So a guy comes into a bar... And he is cited for public indecency.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops