Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

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What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

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What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

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I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

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If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

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There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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Tod:Hey Rick wanna hear a joke?Rick:No.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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teacher: say ur alphabet kid: abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwuxyz kid:wheres the pee teacher:half way down my leg

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Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

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What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

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what do u call a 7th grade ninga joe waldeaker the sarah freek

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Mommy, Mommy, I don't like Daddy! Well leave him on the side of the plate and eat your peas instead!

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What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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Yo mama is so ugly that she never got married or involved with anyone in her lifetime because everyone was to scared and ashamed to be around her. you're adopted

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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Bare with me here, im gonna change this up a bit What's better then finding a worm in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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