A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

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What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

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Why was the black guy running away with a sack full of money? He was rushing to local charity to donate the money. It was closing in 2 minutes.

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There are too many people in this bar, a man says. He then walks out of the bar and proceeds to visit his grandmother. Orange.

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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what is the difference between a picture of brooklyn decker and my grandma....i jack off to the picture of my grandma

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm Scizophrenic And so am I.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

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What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

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A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

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What do communists and strawberries have in common? You can eat them.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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What do you get when an elephant and a pig have baby? Nothing, mating between animals must take place between animals of the same species, thus making it impossible to cross these two animals

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What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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What's long and black? A 12 inch black dick.

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A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

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A blonde a brunette and a ginger jump off a cliff they die upon impact and their families mourn for years to come.

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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Q:what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? other person: What? A:how am i suppose to know I'm not a lawyer.

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How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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