Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

What's endangered like the Spotted Owl? A Cancer patient.

Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

One man's trash is another dyslexic man's shart.

She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

hi

Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

Bryson got a concussion...he died

Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Okay, are you a tree? A: No, no I am not.

So a baby seal walks into a club...

how many boys does it take to use 4 computers? 4.

Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

Justin beiber comment if u get it

How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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