Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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What's funny about anti-humor? Nothing.

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How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

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ROSES ARE RED VILOTS ARE BLUE I HOPE YOU KNOW IM A JEW

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because seven threatened to murder his family

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What did the black man say to the jew and the blonde girl as they walked to the car. Shotgun.

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A bear walked into a bar and said to the bartender," I'd li.........................ke one beer please. " The bartender replied, " Sure. But why the big pause? "

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Why did the blind man fail his math test? Because he had been raped and murdered. Going blind is a side effect of death.

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Yo mama is so fat because she doesn't exercise and eats way too much calories. The reason fat people gain weight is because of low metabolism which means her body is not burning a lot of fat and instead is storing fat. A healthy life style such as playing sports, walking in a park, or eating healthy foods will benefit her from any medical complications in the future.

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Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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why couldn't jimmy play on the swings at recess.. Because he's been dead for 5 years

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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A guy walks into a bar, unfortunately for him, he walked in on a huge bar fight and managed to get the hell knocked out of him as he entered the door.

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FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? Perhaps he was doing a project on tree-life.

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What do you call a woman who can't walk? A paraplegic.

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Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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