What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

What does a hooker eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Food.

What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Beating cancer. Guess Steve Jobs they didn't make an app for that.

Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

A British man walks into a bar. He has to get stitches.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

Tall asians

Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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