Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

Hey Lady Gaga, Madonna called, she wants her clothes back; she lend them to you weeks ago for a concert because you didn't have anything to wear and you haven't returned them yet.

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

Why did the man think he was hungry? Answer: Because his brain told that he needed to Eat or he was going to be really hungry. Made by eli

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

24

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, and has two possible oxidation states, +2 and the slightly more stable +4. Tin is the 49th most abundant element and has, with 10 stable isotopes, the largest number of stable isotopes in the periodic table. It is a silvery, malleable other metal that is not easily oxidized in air, obtained chiefly from the mineral cassiterite where it occurs as tin dioxide, SnO2.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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