I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

a man walks into a bar with a monkey i forgot the rest of the joke your moms a whore

What more orange that a lime? Most things.

If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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