Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

Your girlfriend.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

What more orange that a lime? Most things.

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

a man walks into a bar with a monkey i forgot the rest of the joke your moms a whore

After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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