What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

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what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

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You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

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Mogok Papiti.

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SUCK MY NUTS

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Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

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who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

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Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

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How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Women's rights

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A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops