Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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Whats the difference between a duck? Both legs are of the same length. Especially the left one.

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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Q: How much dirt is in a hole 3 by 6 by 2 feet? A: There's no dirt, it's a hole.

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Hey Jew. What? Shut up.

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Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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Q- How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A- You Poke Her Face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

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Why did the boy fall asleep in class? He was tired.

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What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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Two hunters walk in to the forest. They have a great time ending the lives of defenceless creatures. They go to their respective homes, eat a light dinner, and fall asleep in their beds.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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