A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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"Do you have Prince Albert in a can?" "No." "Good. Tobacco causes cancer."

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Q: why did Suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Whats funnier then two babies falling off a cliff? 2 babies falling off a cliff

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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What rhymes with car? Not kangaroo

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender immediately shoots it in the face with a double barrel shotgun, ending the rabid animal's life

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

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What do you call a group of black guys riding on horseback? You don't. You call the cops first.

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Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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Do you smell that? Sex and candy?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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Pickles are moist.

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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