Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Justin Bieber

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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What did the caveman say to the dinosaurs, nothing dinosaurs are from the Triassic period 25 million years ago, while the origin of man came around 230000 years ago, so there would be a massive time difference and and would never seen each other.

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2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

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Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

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what is pink and shaped like a banana? A pink banana.

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What was the homeless guy doing on the side of the rode? Begging for money.

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whats the biggest ever snake found ? i dont know i dont study snakes :O

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what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating its way up.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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why am i so sexy? I was raised by a dog.

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Why did the blonde go to law school? She was sick of people assuming that she was not an intelligent woman due to negative sterotypes about her gender and hair color and set out to prove said people wrong.

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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Why do Christians believe in God? Because they're stupid

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Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

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Mommy, Mommy, I don't like Daddy! Well leave him on the side of the plate and eat your peas instead!

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Why did i try to write a funny joke? Cuz i was desperately bored.....

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Why is Justin bieber gay? Because he is atracted to men

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops