A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

What's long,black and wrapped in something yellow ?? A twix

This is a bad anti-joke. Just kidding, it's a good one.

Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

Is it hungry in here? Or is it just me?

knock, knock who's there? boo boo who? sorry i dont know anyone named boohoo so get the hell off my lawn

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

You know what I am gonna come up with that could potentially make me millions of dollars? An idea that could potentially make me millions of dollars.

On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had Alzheimers and forgot that he lived on the other side of the street.

Boxing on Boxing Day

what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

why do they sparkle?!?!?!?!

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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