How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer...and the other is a watermelon.

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Your Mama's so fat she can't fit into a toy car!

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

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What do you get when you cross an Indian and a duck? An Indian duck.

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Why do women have boobs? In order to feed their infants

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What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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a child swallows a cleaning product, why is he given chocolate milk? to make him happy before he dies

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Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

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Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

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Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

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Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple this joke.

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Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

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What did the dog say to his own poop? You gonna eat that?

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What do dogs and keyboards have in common? Nothing.

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.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

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Why did Susan fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock... Who's there? Not Susan...

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what does an adhd kid that causes all kind of trouble get? a buncha ass whoopins and some meds to dope his ass up

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Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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