What's short, white, and is sick and tired of your shit? A toilet. What's white and killed Elvis? Also a toilet.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

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What's faster than a black man with a TV? olympic sprinters, cyclists, street legal cars, speed boats, helicopters, commercial airliners, bullets, fighters jets, missiles, SR-71, space shuttles, rocket ships, anything in orbit, excited electrons, and quite a lot more, actually.

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A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

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Why did the old man go to the retirement home? The 75 year old man had a 45 year career in pluming and he thought it was a good time to retire after saving enough money to be happy and he could spend the rest of his life with his wife. The retirement home was also not that far away from his grandchildren so he liked the location and the home was also very clean and the workers seemed very nice. But this was just a visit to see if he liked it, he may live there soon.

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Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Just me

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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24

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Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I am I am who? I am here to see you

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So, today I was walking down the street... I met a black guy.

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Gay republicans

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If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's the square root of yo mama? That which when multiplied by itself equals yo mama.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

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Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

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Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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sucks Syntax...

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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