Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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A man walks into a bar, and he died.

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a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

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Does anyone know any good ways to piss off an Grammar Nazi?

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There were 3 men on a rough each granted one wish to make. The first guy sees a bird and runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a bird and he flies away. The second guy sees a butterfly so he too runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a butterfly and flies away. The third guy telling himself those were all stupid wishes, makes up his mind what he is going to wish for so he runs to the ledge and just after he says "I wish to be" he trips on the ledge and says, "shit!" So his wish was granted and shit he became. The End.

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

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Calling your penis a chose because it's small and fat.

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An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

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A White and a Chinese got in a fight, who won? None. The fight was unable to begin because a color is not a living organism.

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

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What did the jew do to his waiter? He explained how he had provided excellent service and left a very generous tip to applaud his efforts.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Someone keeps shitting in my garden

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Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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Good afternoon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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