Why did Steve put his trumpet in the fridge? He had begun the early stages of dementia and was becoming increasingly confused and detached from reality. Also he was German.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

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Roses are red Violets are actually the color violet, contrary to popular belief.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

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Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

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If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

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Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

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An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

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Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

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Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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Where do the biggest potatoes grow? the ground.

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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Q: Why didn't the blonde answer the call from her boyfriend? A: She had died in a rollover the day before.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because the light was red and cars had stopped.

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Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It escaped the zoo.

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A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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