An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

Whats worse than seeing a child with autism? Seeing a child doin' serious damage in a mosh pit

A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

Why did the portuguese fisherman take out a $20,000 loan with a reknown loan shark at exorbitant interest rates? He needed to buy a kidney on the black market for his drug addicted daughter who had also destroyed his credit score meaning he coudln't get a loan from the usual credit facilities such as banks and credit unions.

What do a blueberry and a raspberry have in common? They are both commonly used in parfaits.

why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead.

The t rex said to the textbook ............. Im not going to read you

what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

when trouble come down in your neighborhood who you gonna call? the local law enforcement or another form of personal protection

Knock knock Who's There Sally Sally who? Sally who .got hit with a fridge and fell off a tree because I have no arms. Sorry, I do not know you.

Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Why didn't the Alzheimers patient put on her shoes? She didn't leave the elderly home that day, thus taking away the need to put on shoes.

Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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