Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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Your mama sucks so much dick, it's not funny.

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What do you call a man with no arms an no legs in the ocean? Bob What do you call the same man on your front porch? Matt What do you call the same man on your wall? Art

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

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want to hear a joke? then go ask someone else i dont know any.

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What's white and black? Color blind.

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Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

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#IsaiahAfterAD&B

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What's the connection between Obama and Michael Jackson? They both want to be a girl.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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Knock knock Who's there. Interrupting cow, sorry you can see where this is going, just let me in without asking any more questions please.

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Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

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The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

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Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

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How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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