what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

thumb_up thumb_down -23

how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down -25

" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

2 guys walk into a bar the first gys says id like a beer the second guy says me to

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

69

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Heskey time.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do boats and starving children have in common? They both float, except for the starving children.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969 i like potatos 696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops