Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? A guitar is an instrument used to produce noise and a fish is a living orgnism native to lakes and oceans

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

Why don't gingerbread cookies have souls? Cookies don't have souls.

Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

A: Roses are red, Violets are blue. B: Then why are they called violets? A: I NEVER NOTICED THAT!

Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

- Why the black people smell? - To let even the blind person hate them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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