Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

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Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

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Penis

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Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

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So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

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One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

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A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

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How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

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When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? None because alligators don't fly.

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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I used play skyrim...but then I realsied I had a lot of exams so I had to stop

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops