I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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Why did Colussi miss school for 2 years? -Because he died

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How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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Barack Obama is a good president.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

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Q: Whats worse than spilling milk? A: Cancer Q: Whats worse than cancer? A: Rebecca Black

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What did the doctor say to the man on the nice day? You have cancer. How nice the day was is irrelevant

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how does a chinese chick check if she's pregnant? swallows a rubix cube and if it comes out solved shes pregnant

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What's better than doing the Hannah Montana's hoedown-throwdown? Throwin' that ho down.

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

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Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

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Whats worse than seeing a child with autism? Seeing a child doin' serious damage in a mosh pit

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Why did the kid fall off the bike? Because he was paraplegic.

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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