Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

Doesn't matter, had sex. Except for the STD's I possibly contracted.

Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

The man walked into the church and stayed there.

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

Adam: knock knock!! Eve: who's there? Adam: don't be silly, just open the f*cking door!!

Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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