Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock, Knock? Who's There? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the white man's baby black? The mother was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What happened to the guy that got a perfect score on his S.A.T.'s? He was murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Where was Susy after the bombing? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

thumb_up thumb_down -14

An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Brian knew how to save the world from the death penalty: "Let's kill everybody who is not against it." So I killed Brian and waste my time in death row now.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man in an airport asked me if i wanted my bag to be carry-on. So i said yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What do you call a man with no arms, legs, and an eyepatch A: Names

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops