What's old and wrinkly? old people

thumb_up thumb_down +4

That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mum's so fat, she attends regular weight loss facilities to lose weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

thumb_up thumb_down +4

April showers bring... tornadoes that kill families

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN cil you have such a dirty mind

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I like the color potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A White and a Chinese got in a fight, who won? None. The fight was unable to begin because a color is not a living organism.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

1st guy:i like anti jokes. 2nd guy:me too, they make me laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A bartender walks up to a church and a synagogue

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man with a blue house wears a blue shirt and wears blue jeans. Someone from a red house with a red shirt knocks on his door. He is invited in because they are friends and both have a wonderful time.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

two penguins are hanging out in Antartica. the one looks to the other an says "man its really cold out" the other quicky waddles away because of the strange alien sound its friend just made

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats the difference in car and a bicycle? One has an engine and drivetrain designed to run on gas and the other is powered by your output of work

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops