Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

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My dog got out of it's cage. So I found it and be the shit out of

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Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

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Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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Nicki Minaj walks into a bar... there's no punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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Q: What do you get if you combine a melody, instrumentation, rhythm, and vocals? A: Um, music, you idiot.

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Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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