a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

your mother is so fat that her doctor advised her to stick to a strict diet and exercise routine to help her lose weight

Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

Do you like cheese? Yes. Okay.

Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

what did Russell wilson get for Christmas a seahawk..

Q: How do you turn a purple panda into a red panda A: Feed it grey poop and because it tasted so bad it got so mad it turned red.

How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

What did the rich man say to the poor man? i feel sorry for you

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

why did the chicken cross the rode?????? i dont know because he felt like it???????????p.s.i actually dont know why he crossed the rode so go ask the next who makes a joke about a chicken crossing a rode?

A black guy , a white guy and a jew walk into a resturaunt They are offered the special.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Knock, Knock Knock, Knock who? Knock, Knock

How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

A black man and a mexican jump of a building to see who hits the ground first. Who wins? Society.

roses are red violets are blue i like elephants

What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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