Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? because he wanted to go hunting.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Whats big, grey, and cant climb trees? A carpark

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

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What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

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What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Its behind you like if you looked behind

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what do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question ................

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roses are red grass is green your little ugly a*s makes me wanna scream

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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