Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. At what point would a chicken consciously know it was crossing a road.

:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

what did the man say to then other man when he said a joke, "Ha"

What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

How do you make a man cry? you torture him

why was the little boy crying? He had dead mice shoved up his asshole.

Q: Why did Grandma fall down the stairs? A: Because she had a brain hammerage

A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

A lot eh?

Whats pink red and silver? A baby chewing on reason blades. Whats pink red silver and smells bad? Same baby two weeks later.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

Hey ask me if i'm a train? Are you a train? No...

What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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