A priest, a jew, and a pirate walk into a bar. An exchange of dialogue occurs with the bartender and hilarity ensues.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returns and says, "My friend does not have a pulse, so I stand by my prior assumption that he is dead."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

this last joke was a correction to the other one

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The fact that you actually took time to read this cynically hypnotizing answer that you cannot seem to stop reading even though you know that this sentence is just a clever run to show the epitomy of the anti joke. ha-ha.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the mother give her family on christmas? Some gelt, dreidels, and Challah because it also happened to be Chanukah on Christmas that year

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What are kids supposed to do in American classrooms if a nuke hits nearby? Hide under the desk. (This is a fact) Moral: Like that is gonna help... seriously that is ridiculous!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

thumb_up thumb_down -10

a man walked into a bar and said ow

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

thumb_up thumb_down -10

-What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? -Slap HER!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A child walks into a classroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Man: You know you're crazy when you talk to inanimate objects, you know you're Insane when they reply. Stick: I know, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a Palestinian with a large blade at the throat of an Israeli? a barber

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops