Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

Ludwig van Beethoven, John Coltrane, John Lennon, and Justin Bieber are out for lunch at a taco stand. The owner calls the police, and Justin Bieber is arrested for digging up corpses.

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

Do you also think Daffy Duck is really attractive when he dresses up like a woman? Yeah, me neither...

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

whats worse than breaking your arm? getting raped by a squirel

Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

Skinny people fart less.

A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

What is black and has no education A tire.

My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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