why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks into a bar. The bartender lights him on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

when i yell your name i probably want your attention :) S.H.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Yo mama is so fat, she's bigger than a whale. I have two fathers.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q. What is ginger and ginger? A. a ginger

thumb_up thumb_down -26

who looks like a double rainbow? gun baby who was pregant and rapes her

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Wanna hear a riddle? Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What is worse than the holocaust? A worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call a man with no legs, arms, or a head? A torso.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

10 kids are on a bus. It's just a normal bus, it takes the kids to school and lets them off.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops