How do you keep an idiot in suspense..............

How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

why didnt little timmy finish his test he was eaten by a muslim rhino... .

A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

Click here for free sandwich.

why did the teenaged girl cry? she was about to have an abortion

What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

What did the blind kid say to his dad Nothing , his dads dead

Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

Christanity One Womans Excuse of Not Having an Affair Got Totaly Out of Hand

What did one Dentist say to the other? You are fat.

Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

Did you hear about the man who lost his right arm and left leg... He's ok now he's all right.

A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

Why are reading anti-jokes so funny? Im not sure, i just read them and laughter ensues.

Sir, your wife is dead

Why did my bed broke? Becaus i had sex with your mom!

A white man is found dead in an alley way, who was the murderer? The black guy trying to climb up the walls to escape.

Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...