A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

what does I.C.T mean when a teacher says it it means I cant teach

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

What's black and hanging from the tree in my backyard? My black, tree-hugging friend.

Why did the mexican jump over the fence? It was a shortcut.

Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

Ok so, we have bread , tofu, coolwhip

What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

I may have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

What did the cow say when he saw his family get murdered? Moo.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

A: Knock Knock. B:Whose there? A:Jehovah witness!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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