Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of tree? A Pool Table

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Hail Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mam is so fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the mexican wash his car? The car was dirty

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The duck didn't cross the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It probably saw an animal that it wanted to chase, or a person carrying food, or another dog that it wanted to make friends with.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. At what point would a chicken consciously know it was crossing a road.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's bigger than a horse ? An elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the man with one leg good at balancing on one foot? He used crutches.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? Being eaten by a giant octopus. What's worse than being eaten by a giant octopus? 3 Bee Stings!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops