Roses are red violets are blue make me a sandwhich so i can eat it

What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

You read this in school as a crowd of kids stand behind you laughing at your screen

Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

whats worse than failing your maths test?

what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

What do you do when a red gorilla comes running at you with 7 dominoes in his hand Ask him to stop

how many people were on the bus........ 0 cause the bus was parked for 45 years

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? because it got shot before it could get there.

Whats the square root of pie? Pies are round.

whats worse that being raped by a giant squirrel? being raped by two giant squirrels.

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

why is it good to be a fireman? because they save lives

You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

what did the paraplegic man get for Christmas? a unicycle

what do you call two mexicans playing basketball? juan on juan

A baby seal walks into a club. He is immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

A:Knock Knock B:It's open

What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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