A man walks into a bar and shuffles his way through the intoxicated patrons. He finds the only open stool and quickly sits in it before any other see it. The bartender approaches him and ask: "What will it be?" The man replies: "Can I have a beer?"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

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What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

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Why is Chuck Norris so frickin awesome? He just is cause he's chuck norris

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why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

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I would write a racist joke, but racism is offensive

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet his friend the horse at a bar

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you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

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How do you get birds to land in your back yard? With a gun.

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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Why did i try to write a funny joke? Cuz i was desperately bored.....

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

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What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

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Why did the boy do his homework? For fun.

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What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

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yo mama so ugly she made a happy meal frown.

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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