a black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. the bartender says thats cool where did you get it ....... the parrot says africa

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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What happened to the man taking a shit? An unfortunate drop of water splashed back onto his arse

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Q: Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? A: Neither did she...

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Wanna hear a joke? Ruddell had sex.

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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Want to hear a joke? 12 year olds

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whats the diffrence between madeline macan and a submarine? there isnt one there both at the bottom of the sea and full of seaman

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Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

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What is red and green and goes round and round? A frog in a blender!

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What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

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A man with glasses and a cane walks out if a clothing store and accidentally bumps into a woman, knocking his hat off "Can't you watch where you're going?" the woman asks. The man then slaps her, knocking her to the ground. He picks up his new designer fedora, and drives off in his $90,000 Cadillac. The woman, after dusting herself off, gets the guy's plates, convinces a few witnesses to testify against the man, and informs the authorities of an assault. He was later arrested for assault as well as pimping and soliciting sex. He is found guilty in a court of law and is sentenced to 2-5 years in prison, and is doled a hefty fine.

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What's the difference between a guy who sees the glass half empty and a guy who sees the glass half full? The first guy is happier because his tables tip more than the second guy's.

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Q: What did the mute kid say to his mother ?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a dead Jewish girl that lay on the other side. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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What is the difference between a jew and girl scouts. Girl scouts come back from camp

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops