John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

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Why does 1 + 1 = 2? ....seriously P

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

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I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

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Child: Hey mom can i go to the store with you? Mom: no son, i'm not really going to the store. I'm cheating on your father.

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why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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Bacon is delcious.

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What did little Timmy find at the bottom of the well? The fact that he could no longer breathe and thus causing him to drown.

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

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what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

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Face...tastes like chicken!

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Why did the man have a hard time trying to open the door? The door was locked

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

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Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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