Why did the ship get lost at sea? The captain was a piece of bread.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

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What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

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Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

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What did the red paint say to the blue paint? They said nothing. Paints don't talk and you need to see a doctor if you answered anything else.

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What happens when you yank on someones nuts? They cry

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What's worse than a man with AIDS? The fact that this is considered a joke.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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What's worse than being raped? Not a whole lot-- rape is a very serious mental and emotional strain that will stick with a person for the remainder of their life.

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A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

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what do you get when you cross a rhino and a chicken? well, if you're unlucky and too close too the chicken, salmonella if you provoke the rhino, impaled

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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Women can vote? wtf

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Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

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What do you say to the woman who just got raped? Nothing you just raped her

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Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

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Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

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I agree

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Vote this up or I'll tell my mum!

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Dont read this joke

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how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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