What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a depressed alcoholic drug addict whose children had all been diagnosed with a rare form of terminal brain cancer, and he decided to end it then and there by jumping in front of an approaching bus.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

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My mom told me to shut up because I was screaming as I was strangled.

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

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What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Someone born in the 1970s feeling self-righteous about defending the victims.

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Two Naked men jump off a cliff. Three months later, an entire pack of Cub Scouts were enrolled in group therapy. It's ongoing.

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Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

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What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

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What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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a kid was running across the street. he just got hit by a truck

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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What do you call a black women serving 60 years in prison? A prisoner.

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What do you call a dog that can't pass an Algebra test? A dog.

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Where was susie after the explosion? Everywhere

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this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops