what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

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what do u call a black person a black person dehh

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I like my girls like my wisky. Strong, tastes and the leading cause of liver damage.

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So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

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Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

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Whats a cat? A cat!

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i like pie

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

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What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

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roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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