You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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A black man walks up to a white man with a shaved head and boots in a bar He then hands him a ten dollar bill and tells him he dropped it

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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Did you hear the one about the guy who couldn't tell any funny jokes? He went to Anti Joke and posted 1000's.

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What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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were at work systems r down

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Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

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A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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