why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

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What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

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Bitch

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What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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2 + 2 = 4

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Why did the man cut his hair? Cause he has cancer

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Why was the boy so tired? He had to carry his moms dead body up the stairs.

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What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

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What did the boy say to the girl? I like you hi.

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Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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Knock knock. Get out!!

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

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How do you kill a blonde? Choke her.

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So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

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Listen, I do not really care anymore, I admit it, I dont mind screwing with people, but if your name is Tifa, my name is lets see... Solid Snake, yeah, but call me big boss. Listen, be honest with me, if you do not trust me, just do not give me a random name, Tifa as in Tifa Lockheart? Final Fantasy? Wake up, girl/guy, you are losing your touch at this.

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Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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