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A drunken man grabbed a gun and shot his entire family to death. Luckily, a even drunker man had shot them moments before, so it really only served to ruin the perfectly good wall behind them with bullet holes.

Why did the little girl fall to death? Because pigs can't fly. It's impossible.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

Your mom's so fat... she probably needs to go on some sort of diet to avoid a serious heart condition and inevetible death

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" After hearing this common expression, the horse looks up at the bartender. With this look, the bartender realizes that he has been speaking to I'll Have Another. Aware his faux pas, the bartender apologizes and pours him a free drink. The free drink does little for I'll Have Another's crushed dreams.

What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

why did justin go to maddie parris house to fuck her.....

What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

Q. whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I dont jump on my trampoline with metal cleats.

Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

Why does Tim Tebow kneel and pray after there's a positive outcome of the previous play? No, seriously, why does he do that?

What did grandma get little Benjamin for Christmas? Nothing, she died last year

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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