what goes woof ? A dog.

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Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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Whos allergic to BS You R! :D

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Im cute hehehee

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Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

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Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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Obama

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

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Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

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Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

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MAKE TEA NOT WAR!

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

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What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

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Why does 1 + 1 = 2? ....seriously P

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A:knock, knock B:who's there A:come in B:come in who A:me I'm gay

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''Today is Star Wars day :)'' ''Why's that?'' ''guess'' ''I don't know :/'' ''It's May the 4th!'' ''And?'' ''May the 4th be with you :p''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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