Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

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What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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These jokes don't have punchlines.

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A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

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What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Q:what happen to amy's baby A:it was eaten by a dingo.

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How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

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A lion walks into petsmart and asks the cashier were the dog food is. The Cashier replies your a cat and the cat food is in isle 4 you pussy

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies nothing child abuse is not a funny matter.

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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Why is my lawn red? Because i forgot to tell my neighbor's children to move

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whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

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If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

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roses are red violets are red the whole world is red i started the holocaust

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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