roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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A car walks into a bar.

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning Get your foot off of his head

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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edmond alward. handyman services. call 0858430803.

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A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

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Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

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im @ work, LOL.

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What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

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If you walked into a grocery store right in the middle of Cuba what won't you see? The missing Malaysian MH370 Boeing.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm homosexual And so is my boyfriend Jeremy, with whom I have shared countless evenings of joy and laughter.

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What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

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Whats the difference between a house and a mouse If you think about it , quite a lot really

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Why did the black person jump the fences? because he was in a relay race.

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Once upon of time there was 2 boys named Bucky and Thorn. They were best of friends and always came up with amusing adventures. So one day, during summer time before high school senior year, Bucky and Thorn went to go hiking on the mountain called Mt. Saint Lasik. It was the tallest mountain of the city. The city was called "The City of Dreams" because everyone had a dream that one day they will accomplish their goals. Well Bucky had a goal and his goal was to be the youngest to ever climb the mountain. However, Thorn was jealous because he as 11 toes. Since he can't hike they decided to go camping at Walala National Park. One day they saw a big huge bear named Pervus. Pervus told them that they were not allowed to be there. Thorn told Pervus to shut the hell up because he can't hike mountains. A girl came suddenly showed up. It was a girl named Sally. She was half black, white, Spanish, ad French, and she could sweet talk bears. Pervus said "Now it's time to boogey woogey woogey" and began dancing like a maniac. Police arrived. Officer Caleb Johnson was in the scene to investigate. "Where were you at the night of April 24th?" To which Bucky replied "To what do I owe pleasure of speaking?" Harry, his front door neighbor stole the cop car and drove off to New Guinea. God knows how or why Harry showed up. Coincidentally, Sally decided it was time to leave. Everyone left utterly confused. The End.

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A man walks into a metal bar He had a swell time.

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GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

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it was dark outside so u know what i did....went to sleep

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pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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