what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

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Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

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my wife out of the kitchen

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A Penguin Waddles into Abercrombie and Fitch.

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Is it a ironic if a man with ADD is driving a Ford Focus?

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

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what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

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What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

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Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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Robin, get in the batmobile

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

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a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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